Tuesday, January 11, 2011


 Yup, we wound up at Hasbro Children's Hospital.  I knew we were in trouble when Sophie woke up last Wednesday morning.  She was breathing rapidly and after two breathing treatments not much had changed.  So, I packed a bag and off we went.  I still thought that I was probably overreacting and that we'd only be there for a short time.  How wrong I was.

We did not have to wait too long before Sophie was taken back into an exam room.  She was hooked up to a machine to monitor her oxygen level-between 90-93%-and was administered breathing treatments every 30 minutes.  I'm not sure if you've ever attempted to contain a 2-year old on a gurney before but it's not easy.  And it's especially hard when the albuterol kicks in and she starts bouncing off the walls.  It's a little like trying to catch a greased pig! 

After about the fourth unsuccessful treatment, the doctor ordered a chest x-ray that indicated pneumonia.  We would be admitted. 

As you all know, I do not like hospitals and hate when my children have to be in them.  It's excruciating to watch nurses shove tubes down your child's nostrils as she screams, put breathing masks over her face, and the numbers on the machine go up and down like a yo-yo all night.  We heard words like "intensive care" and "chronic lung disease."  All of this is so scary and a sad reminder of what this poor baby has already been through in her short life.  But with the help from some friends and family we got through it and Sophie came home on Sunday.  Just in time for mommy to get sick...

Monday, January 3, 2011

RSV, Otherwise Known as Really Sucky Virus!

Sophie started with a fever last night and a slight cough.  I was a little nervous since I had to go back to work today but I figured it was just a little cold.  She wasn't up when I went to work so I called my babysitter around 8:30.  Her fever was still up but seemed okay.  Then, I got a phone call from Nanny Sue at about 10:15.  You have to understand that this woman never calls me so I knew that something was wrong.  When I called her back we both decided that Sophie could use a breathing treatment to help her with all of the coughing.  I was a little more concerned at this point but still not alarmed.

I arrived home at 3:15 and noticed that Sophie was breathing rapidly.  Her little tummy was going in and out quickly and she was coughing constantly.  I gave her another treatment and saw that there was no change so it was off to the doctor! 

After 2 breathing treatments, blood work, and Tylenol, our doctor determined that Sophie had RSV.  RSV is short for Respiratory Syncytial Virus or as I like to call it, Really Sucky Virus!  A lot of children get RSV but it can be very serious in preemies.  I know this firsthand because when Lindsay was 6 months old, she came down with RSV and ended up in the ICU at Hasbro.  Her infection went from bad to worse within a matter of hours and turned into life-threatening Bronchiolitis.  This is a deep lung infection that can cause death and nearly did in Lindsay.  So when I hear the intials RSV, I get a little PTSD!

Our doctor was quick to try and reassure me that Sophie is older and stronger now so she is better equipped to handle RSV and the chances that it will become more serious aren't as high.  But still I worry.  I worry for her and I worry for Lindsay.  I hate to see my daughters sick.  And I don't think they should ever have to see the inside of a hospital again after they spent the first 3 months of their lives in one.  So I'll watch them closely, give them lots of hugs, and hope for the best.  That's really all I can do.

Saturday, January 1, 2011

New Year's Resolutions

I have not written since August.  I started a new position then and have been overwhelmed with all of the horrible wonderful new things that come with that.  But it's a new year and one of my resolutions is to keep up with this blog.  I am going to try to post here at least 3 times a week.  So with that being said, here is my first post of 2011.

Every year I make at least one New Year's Resolution.  Three years ago I told people that my resolution was to gain 20 pounds since I knew that was one I could keep!  Almost every year, I committ to living in the moment and trying to be more present focused.  It's on my list again this year.  I expect that one to be thrown out the window by 8:00 Monday morning. 

One resolution that I intend to keep this year is to enjoy being a mother more.  I know that some of you who know me may be saying to yourselves, "What!? You always seem like you're loving every minute of it!"  And I do enjoy it most of the time but lately I have found myself complaining a lot.  Maybe not to any of you, but inside my own head.  I have gotten hung up on how exhausted I am all the time and on counting the minutes until naptime or bedtime when I can have 5 uninterrupted minutes to myself.  I have even resorted to locking myself in the bathroom when Rick comes home and pretending that I have to go so that I can have some peace for a few minutes.  All of this is very sad to me. 

I have two gorgeous daughters who are healthy, smart, and happy.  I know many mothers who cannot say this but still seem to enjoy being a mom.  I know moms who have children with Down's Syndrome, autism, or developmental delays.  What I notice in many of these warrior moms is that they have learned to appreciate all of the small successes and joys that a lot of us take for granted. 

I have resolved this year that I am going to stop wishing for a nap every five seconds minutes and instead enjoy all of the craziness that comes with being a mom of twins.  I am going to create wonderful memories with them and I am going to stop watching the clock or playing on my iPhone while their lives whiz by. 

Happy New Year!